


The Courage to Actually Do It

by lol-phan-af (lol_phan_af)



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/F, Friends to Lovers, Getting Together
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-04
Updated: 2017-07-04
Packaged: 2018-11-23 02:55:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,780
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11393910
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lol_phan_af/pseuds/lol-phan-af
Summary: Maria smiled back, cherry red lips curling upward, resting their foreheads together. Her eyes fluttered shut, the gold eyeshadow dusted across her eyelids gleaming, eyelashes long enough that Eliza could feel them tickling her cheeks. It would be so easy for her to lean in, to finally kiss Maria like she'd been wanting to for years now. As she tried to gather her strength, Maria spun Eliza under her arm and continued dancing with her, and Eliza's courage was gone as fast as it materialized.





	The Courage to Actually Do It

Meeting Maria happened by chance. It came from betrayal and heartbreak and a series of events worthy of a cheesy soap opera that Eliza would never watch in a million years let alone star in. It was messy and unforgiving, but it resulted in Eliza meeting the best friend she'd ever had in her life, and that was something she wouldn't trade for the world.  
  
The party moved around her as Eliza stood still, staring down into her empty cup before setting it down. She felt out of place in the unfamiliar house, every turn a mystery, the risk of getting lost in the crowd more likely to happen than not. As she weaved her way through people to see where Maria went, she couldn't help but feeling that the way she got here was not the way she left. She entered through the dining room, but she ended up in a sort of living room on her way out.  
  
"Eliza!" Maria called, the sequins of her red dress sparkling in the chandelier light hanging above them. Her matching red stilettos clacked against the floor as she crashed into her, arms resting on her shoulders. Eliza didn't understand how she walked in those things.  
  
"Hello," Eliza said. Her hands reached for Maria's waist on instinct, but she didn't have the courage to actually do it.  
  
"Do you want to dance with me?" She asked, brushing Eliza's hair out of her face. Eliza blushed and tried to act like she wasn't about to explode.  
  
"Yeah, okay," she mumbled. Maria dragged her into the throngs of people, holding both of her hands as she walked backwards, spinning them around.  
  
Eliza could barely hear the song playing over how loud her heart was pounding in her ears. Everyone else at the party fell away to silence, nothing else existed except Maria, Eliza, and the incessant heartbeat that overtook her every thought. She moved without thinking, eyes wide as Maria spun her around, feet moving on their own accord.  
  
Maria pulled Eliza to her, their faces inches away from each other. "Hey, are you alright? You look kind of distant."  
  
"Oh, sorry. No, I'm fine," she assured, twirling away before coming back, Maria's arms wrapped around her.  
  
"Are you sure?" She turned Eliza to face her. "I wouldn't want you to stay somewhere you're not comfortable."  
  
Eliza grinned. "With you here, I'm comfortable."  
  
Maria smiled back, cherry red lips curling upward, resting their foreheads together. Her eyes fluttered shut, the gold eyeshadow dusted across her eyelids gleaming, eyelashes long enough that Eliza could feel them tickling her cheeks. It would be so easy for her to lean in, to finally kiss Maria like she'd been wanting to for years now. As she tried to gather her strength, Maria spun Eliza under her arm and continued dancing with her, and Eliza's courage was gone as fast as it materialized.  
  
She thought that maybe this is what they'd always be. Maybe Eliza would spend her whole time in Maria's close company, always trying to gather the nerves and the bravery to tell Maria something, but never getting to. Maybe they would stay friends for the rest of their lives, and Eliza was okay with that, grateful to be able to know Maria at all, but she couldn't help but long to have her feelings returned to her.  
  
They either spent moments or hours dancing, Eliza couldn't tell, before she got dizzy and had to sit down. The soft cushion of the chair engulfed her, the bright light of the moon shining in through the wide window next to her. Maria danced without her, alone but not lonely, a force to be reckoned with as she moved. People came up to her and Eliza watched each of them with a careful eye, as Maria turned them each down with a soft smile and a glance in Eliza's direction, and Eliza beamed back.  
  
Maria's smile was infectious, and Eliza caught her like a cold.  
  
She woke up to Maria's hands cradling her face, once again in too close quarters, but not close enough in Eliza's eyes. Her hair was wild, curls draped across her shoulders in all directions, hair tie around her wrist gone unacknowledged. Her lipstick was still bright red, makeup still perfect, skin shimmering in the sunrise. She was beautiful, Eliza was so lucky that they were friends. She was so lucky to get to love her.  
  
"Hmm, what? What happened?" She looked around and the almost empty living room save for some people passed out on top of each other on the couch.  
  
"You fell asleep, babe," Maria told her.  
  
"Oh. I didn't mean to."  
  
Maria laughed, like champagne and honey and soft summer days. "You're fine. I was thinking we could leave now though, mostly everyone else is gone."  
  
Eliza heaved herself off of the chair, missing the warmth Maria provided as soon as it was gone.  
  
"Yeah, sure," she said. Maria took her hand again and navigated her way through the house, finding the front door by walking down a hallway Eliza had never seen before in her life.  
  
"Will you stay with me?" Eliza muttered. The sun blinded her as she followed Maria onto the sidewalk.  
  
"When we get to your apartment?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"Of course." She flagged down a cab and Eliza watched her with so much love it almost hurt.  
  
Maria lived in the city for years, but she still watched all they skyscrapers pass with wonder in her eyes. She's so beautiful, smiling at the world around her that she gets to be a part of everyday, fingers braced against the door like she's about to open the window and lean out. Eliza watched her in silence, longed for the day when Maria would look at her like she looked at the city, like every detail she had to offer astounded her.  
  
"It's cold as fuck in here," she remarked as they walked into Eliza's apartment, the central air conditioning hitting her skin and making her shiver.  
  
"You get used to it," Eliza responded, kicking off her shoes. Maria was quick to follow, heels hitting the floor with two loud thuds.  
  
"I don't see how. It feels like I'm walking in the tundra."  
  
Eliza laughed and went into her room, changing out of her dress and into a sweater and a pair of shorts, getting out another set of clothes for Maria. The soft mint colored fabric felt nice under her fingers, and she thought of what Maria would look like in the sweater. The neckline would probably either go off her shoulders or hang on barely, sleeves coming down over her hands, giving her the sweater paws that could bring Eliza to tears.    
  
"Fuck," she whispered, burying her face in the fabric. She could only guess how red she was.  
  
Eliza took a deep breath and walked out, handing Maria the clothes and turning to go back to her room. She rushed around trying to put all of her dirty clothes in the hamper and fix everything out of place, rearranging her perfume bottles just in case. It would be easier to just keep her room clean, that way she didn't have to break a sweat trying to make her room look presentable, but Eliza knew she'd forget about her hatred of doing this the moment she didn't want to aim for the hamper.  
  
"This sweater is huge, I kind of love it," Maria said, walking in. She had two water bottles in her hands, one of which she handed to Eliza, the other she kept to herself.  
  
"I buy all of my sweaters that size. It's a look," she explained, fiddling with a loose thread on the edge of her own sweater.  
  
Maria smiled. "It's a cute look."  
  
"Thanks," Eliza muttered, blushing again.  
  
Maria flopped on the bed, pulling the comforter out from under her to cover herself with it. "It's true. You're cute, Eliza."  
  
Eliza climbed under the covers next to her. "So are you."  
  
"Thank you." Her hands smoothed out the blanket on top of her, shaking. She slid further down under the covers and turned towards Eliza, hair fanned out on the pillow.  
  
"Hey, Maria?" Eliza burrowed down next to her.  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"I'm glad that I met you." Her face was on fire, heart pounding. She sounded so stupid, what was she doing?  
  
Maria's eyebrows furrowed. "I'm glad I met you too. Are you alright?"  
  
"Yeah! Yeah, I'm fine! I'm just happy we're friends, thought I'd tell you that."  
  
She grinned. "I'm happy we're friends too."  
  
"That's good." Eliza paused, hands gripping her pillowcase. "That being said, though, I'm gonna go to bed."  
  
"Okay," Maria said, "me too."  
  
"Goodnight," Eliza mumbled, going to turn away.  
  
"Wait, Eliza, one more thing?"  
  
Eliza turned back, Maria's wide eyes staring at her. "Yeah?"  
  
Maria tasted like peach lip gloss the moment she kissed her, and Eliza saw fireworks going off in her head. She'd dreamed about this almost a million times, had herself worked up into crying fits over the fact that this exact moment would never happen. She kissed back best she could, hands reaching for Maria's sweater and pulling her as close as she could. Maria put her hands on Eliza's waist, humming as Eliza's hands came to cradle her jaw.  
  
Maria pulled away, panting. "Was that okay?" She questioned, searching for any sign of disgust in Eliza's eyes.  
  
Eliza laughed instead. "Yes, it was okay! It was perfect, actually."  
  
"Really? I didn't know if you, like, felt that way about me."  
  
"I've felt this was about you for two years," she admitted.  
  
"Are you kidding? We could've been dating _this whole time_ , and you never _told me_ ?!"  
  
"I didn't think you would like me! We were friends, I thought that's what you wanted us to be." She tapped Maria's arm. "And besides it's not like you said anything either!"  
  
"I love you," Maria blurted out. Eliza kissed her again.  
  
"I love you too."  
  
"We can talk more about this in the morning, if you want" she said, then looked out the window. "Or afternoon. Whenever we wake up."  
  
"I'll see you when we wake up, then," Eliza whispered. Maria smiled and kissed Eliza's forehead, turning to face away from her. Eliza was going to explode.  
  
Eliza smiled as the sun rose higher, almost too excited to sleep, but needing to make the time pass faster. She wrapped her arms around Maria's waist, delighted to feel Maria relax against her. Eliza kissed the back of her neck and hummed, cuddling against her and burying her face in her sweater.  
  
She couldn't wait until they woke up. 

**Author's Note:**

> !!!!


End file.
